Some people are attracted to politics because they crave conflict and attention. Politics is an acceptable way to vent outrage (genuine and false) and every manner of social contempt and loathing. Racism, sexism, homophobia are likely the top three.

 

If after Trump’s crimes and lies you still have a reservoir of goodwill and empathy here’s some advice on how to engage the delusional. This will emphatically not solve the problem of your drunk rightwing uncle or stepfather at the Thanksgiving table.

 

Be genuinely open to learning new things.  Nod understandingly to false facts and unsupported allegations.  Accept rumors and innuendo as proof of their rightness.

 

What is most important is that you learn the code: For the overwhelming number of Americans not on the right wing fringe it is no longer acceptable to be openly racist, sexist and homophobic.  As previous generations used terms like states rights to mean maintain white privilege new terms have arisen.  An example: Instead of saying Black Americans are troublemakers, law breakers and unworthy of the rights enjoyed by other Americans it is now said that the “inner cities” are dens of corruption and electoral subversion.  Instead of overt racist insults white bigots refer to highly qualified African-Americans, Hispanics or women as “diversity hires.”   Wacko-Americans loath the words diversity, equity and inclusion so be careful with those.  Similarly, when LGBTQ Americans demand the freedoms enjoyed by others the wing nuts think are asking for “special privileges,” even though they are simply asking for the same rights everyone else enjoys.  Learning how to decode at least a basic set of rightwing euphemisms is crucial to understanding their discourse.

 

Their fundamental complaint is the loss of white privilege. “Whites only” medical and law schools now are forced to integrate. Smile approvingly, secure in the knowledge that these racist appeals are undermined by an increasingly diverse population, the majority not committed to this principle.  Feel free to engage in flattery, the only tactic that usually works.  Acknowledge that they are misunderstood and justifiably aggrieved and that people of other races, orientations and ideas are to blame.

 

Do not troll the fascists if you are easily triggered by rightwing rhetoric and delusions.

 

How does the conversation conclude?  If your interlocutor intimates that those who disagree with him or her will be smote by God or visited with violence you should end the conversation and find an easier challenge. However you leave it, disengage quietly and peacefully, with a handshake if possible.  If you turn and run the Wacko-American will chase you down.  Walk away slowly.

 

Two serious warnings. First, while your interlocutor may be contentious s/he is probably only courageous enough to be violent in a group so do not confront more than three at a time.  And a special note about armed wingnuts. Praise the weapon they brandish and, if you are allowed, caress it lovingly.  The wingnut wants you to be impressed and intimidated.  If you are outgunned the best thing to do is to meekly acquiesce, accept the insults and escape with your life.  The law will catch up to them eventually. 

 

If you are in Texas when a minor dispute escalates into a full scale conflict you should always shoot first.